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Stupid Warnings
In Honor of Stupid People . . In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity,
Here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sears hairdryer Do not use while sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to work on my hair.) =============================
On a bag of Fritos You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)
=============================
On a bar of Dial soap "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be???....) =============================
On some Swanson frozen dinners "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's just a suggestion.)
=============================
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) "Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!) =============================
Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding
"Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)
=======================
On packaging for a Rowenta iron "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me time?) =============================
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)
=============================
On Nytol Sleep Aid "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(...I'm taking this because???....) =============================
On most brands of Christmas lights "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to what?) =============================
On a Japanese food processor "Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.) =============================
On Sainsbury's peanuts "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash) =============================
On an American Airlines packet of nuts "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: say what?) =============================
On a child's Superman costume "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
=============================
On a Swedish chainsaw "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Sears hairdryer Do not use while sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to work on my hair.) =============================
On a bag of Fritos You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)
=============================
On a bar of Dial soap "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be???....) =============================
On some Swanson frozen dinners "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's just a suggestion.)
=============================
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) "Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!) =============================
Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding
"Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)
=======================
On packaging for a Rowenta iron "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me time?) =============================
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)
=============================
On Nytol Sleep Aid "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(...I'm taking this because???....) =============================
On most brands of Christmas lights "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to what?) =============================
On a Japanese food processor "Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.) =============================
On Sainsbury's peanuts "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash) =============================
On an American Airlines packet of nuts "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: say what?) =============================
On a child's Superman costume "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
=============================
On a Swedish chainsaw "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
Ancel3 |
Latest page update: made by Ancel3
, Oct 29 2007, 8:00 PM EDT
(about this update
About This Update
Edited by Ancel3
333 words added view changes - complete history) |
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